Closing Time on the Evening Train

I took a different train home last night, and had a conductor that I’ve sworn multiple times has been nipping at the potent potables before donning the powder blue jersey.

My suspicions were confirmed as he made his way up the aisles. Entering our car to check tickets, he said it was “Last call” to show our passes.

A little later, as I prepared to exit the train, he said it was “Last call” to get off the train at Hawthorne.

Last call at 6 pm? What is this, Massachusetts?

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