A commuter play in one very short act.
Conductor 1: Hey, Conductor 2, did you see an old guy bolting through the train a few minutes ago?
Conductor 2: No.
Conductor 1: Yeah, he was trying to bamboozle me out of a ticket.
Conductor 2: Hmm. Didn’t see him.
Conductor 1: It’s OK, I’ve got him locked in the bathroom.
Nervous laughter from Greek chorus of morning commuters.